Living With My Autistic 7-Year-Old Son: A Journey of Discovery, Challenge, and Joy
Me and my boy!
Living With My Autistic 7-Year-Old Son: A Journey of Discovery, Challenge, and Joy
Reflections From a Parent's Heart
Seven years ago, my world changed with the arrival of my son—a bright, spirited child who would later be diagnosed as autistic at the early age of 3.
Our journey together has been many things: exhilarating, exhausting, illuminating, and above all, transformative.
I want to share a glimpse into our daily life, the unique joys we experience, the challenges we face, and the profound lessons I’ve learned as a parent.
Everyday Life: Routines, Surprises, and Little Victories
Our days often begin early, as my son finds comfort in predictable routines.
Breakfast is usually the same— ‘Chocolate toast’, with no intention of ever eating the toast – just licking the chocolate 😊- I will never win that argument.
The mood is mostly varied – ‘Good’ Mornings are filled with the sound of his laughter as he watches his favourite episode of ‘The Chase – Celebrity Special’ (its got to be Celebrity – normal people are not as interesting) – ‘Bad’ Mornings, after 7 years, we can spot the tell tale signs a mile off – usually where his mind has been racing in the run-up to the nights sleep, meaning he usually doesn’t sleep, at best getting 2-3hours while instead he roams the house looking to wake up and terrorise his 3 year old brother (just because); or finds some delights from the bathroom to eat, usually toothpaste – opting for the bathroom now, after we have been forced to baby proof the life out of all cupboards in the rest of the house.
The lack of sleep increases the anxiety and stress levels in him, or ‘Spaghetti Brain’ as we like to call it, meaning transitioning from the licking chocolate toast and then on to the next activity – especially on a School morning, frankly awful.
The journey to school, even after a couple of years of doing it, we do try and change tactic – typically he won’t hold hands, he can race off if distressed (or sometimes distracted by a dog), with no sense of danger awareness. If we walk with his younger brother, this can turn the anxiety and stress in to rage that activity each one carefully selected and placed in a precise order.
Transitions can be tricky. Moving from one activity to another often requires patience and creative strategies—timers, visual schedules, sometimes simply a gentle song.
There are days when the world feels overwhelming for him, when the texture of a shirt or the hum of the refrigerator can bring distress.
On those days, we slow down, breathe together, and find solace in quiet spaces – trying to accommodate too many things in 1 day is usually asking for trouble.
Communication: Learning Each Other’s Language
My son communicates in his own way—sometimes with words, often with gestures, always with honesty 😊.
Over the years, I've learned to listen not just with my ears, but with my whole self.
A glance, a hum, or a hand placed softly on my arm can speak volumes.
We celebrate every new word, every attempt at conversation, every shared joke.
Technology has been a wonderful support, with apps and devices helping him express his needs when speech feels out of reach.
Yet, some of our deepest connections happen at the quietest of times: throwing a few stones in to a river or the sea, explaining the precise order of events from morning to night for the next day (and god forbid you don’t stick to it!), or simply sharing a smile across the dinner table.
Challenges: Navigating a World Not Built for Us
There are moments of frustration—his and mine.
Public spaces can be daunting, filled with unfamiliar sounds, sights, and expectations.
Explaining autism to others, advocating for understanding at school or in the community, can be draining at times.
Yet, I’ve discovered a deep well of resilience in both of us. Every challenge is an opportunity to grow, adapt, and find unexpected solutions.
We’ve become experts at celebrating progress in all its forms, no matter how small.
Joy: The Bright Spots That Light Our Path
There is so much joy in our everyday life.
The sparkle in his eyes when he’s learning something new, the infectious laughter that erupts during a favourite cartoon, the way he hugs me tightly when words aren’t enough.
My son’s passions are contagious.
His encyclopedic knowledge of the kids cartoon Bing Bunny, his love for dogs and ducks, his delight in music, especially ‘movement breaks’ songs for kids like Danny Go! — all of these enrich my understanding of his world.
Our home is a place of acceptance and love, where quirks are celebrated and differences make us stronger.
Lessons Learned: Unconditional Love and Shifting Perspectives
Parenting an autistic child has taught me to let go of expectations and embrace the present.
I’ve become more patient (certainly still more room for manoeuvre), more compassionate, and more attuned to the small wonders that might otherwise go unnoticed.
I’ve learned the importance of advocating fiercely for my son, while also maintaining the space for him to be his authentic self.
Above all, I’ve learned that love does not require words, and that the greatest gifts can come in the most unexpected forms.
Final Thoughts
Living with my autistic 7-year-old son is an ever-evolving journey—one that challenges me daily, but rewards me with indescribable joy. For anyone walking a similar path, know that you are not alone, and that every child’s way of being in the world is precious. Together, we can build a more understanding and inclusive world, one small act of empathy at a time.
